36-year-old dad refuses to fix his broken-down car, instead uses girlfriend's car to take his kids to school, until she decides to put her foot down: ‘I’m starting to feel used’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jul 9, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

What is it about men and their old, run-down, broken cars that they seem so unable to let go of? Why do they feel the need to fight for every scrap of metal, until what used to be a full-functioning car becomes nothing but an immovable lump of mismatched nothings?

When I met my boyfriend, he had this old car that he bought for $2000 (a 2009 Fiat Punto), and he was absolutely in love with it. The black paint was almost completely faded, the car would randomly shift to neutral mid-drive, the airbags were not functioning, and at some point, even the horn stopped working, yet I could not convince him to get rid of that junk; it was his baby.

It wasn't until the car refused to start that he was finally persuaded to give it up for a better car. Luckily, it didn't take long before we realised the car was completely gone until we managed to sell it to a junkyard and buy a new car.

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  • The journey for the couple in the story below seems a bit longer than that, since the boyfriend still refuses to let go of his own version of the 2009 Fiat Punto. His girlfriend, however, is tired of taking care of that car herself, and she's tired of pulling all the weight in the relationship while her boyfriend does nothing.

    Keep scrolling to read the full story.

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10525841408
    via Jupiterimages

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITAH for telling my BF he can’t use my vehicle anymore to take his kids to school everyday (more info below)

    I (30F) am starting to get frustrated with my (36M) boyfriend for not taking accountability for his own problems. He had a vehicle that
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 03
    he used to drive but beat it into the ground and never gave the vehicle any TLC until we started dating 4 years ago. He drove it with an expired inspection sticker
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 04
    (like 3 years expired) until he got pulled over and an officer told him next time he would get a ticket.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 05
    The car sat for an entire year until we moved to a new apartment and the car continued to sit for another year until my landlord confronted me that it needed to be removed from the
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 06
    property due to no use and it was difficult to start and move during the winter snow fall for plowing. My BF got upset because "it's his vehicle - he can
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 07
    have it there. Where doesn't say in the lease he can't have it here". After a couple months my landlord brought it up again that he wouldn't resign a lease with us if the car wasn't removed.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 08
    So in January -after my last warning from the landlord. I went and bought a new battery for the car, installed it myself, got a storage unit, had it towed to said storage unit and told my BF
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 09
    he needed to figure out what to do with it. 7 months later the car still sits in the storage unit which I'm paying $200 a month for.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 10
    I recently brought up to him and stated "I don't want this to be a fight - I'm just airing my truths" I stated that I found it really difficult for me to continue to store the vehicle
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 11
    because he's not taking an accountability for it. He's just forgotten about it until I've consistently bring it up to him and ask what he's doing with it.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 12
    I told him I found it really unattractive that there was no initiative and that it was really starting to pime off. I'm the only one that's helped him with
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 13
    it and he's not given a sh. I told him at this point he owes me all the money back but deep down I know that probably won't happen. He sat and
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 14
    listened to what I had to say but didn't really input any sort of game plan to get rid of it. This was a month ago.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 15
    Today I sit here, getting the bank notification that $200 was taken out for the storage unit again and he's given 0 effort to figuring it out.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 16
    He uses my car for whatever he needs - including when his kids were in school he would drive my car everyday to bring them. I really don't have a problem with
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 17
    that - but I'm starting to feel used. He puts gas in the car but treats it like it's an ours vehicle. I paid my car off which was a huge accomplishment for me -
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 18
    but there's a small anxious part of me that worries that if he's driving it and gets in an accident I'm SOL.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 19
    Cheezburger Image 10525843712
    via damircudic

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 20
    I haven't had the conversation with him yet. I know it's going to be a hard one but it's the only way I feel like I can stand my ground at this point. I know his kids may be a little
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 21
    disappointed that they can't see their dad everyday but I feel that I can't continue to keep allowing him to use it like he wants. And I also think I'm just
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 22
    going to have his car towed to his mother's house so they can deal with it. All I've done is put effort into this car. I put in spark plugs,
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 23
    new alternator & the new battery to get it to start. ALL BY MYSELF AND YOUTUBE. The car isn't inspectable and needs a lot of work that I know he won't put into it. And I barely got a thank you.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 24
    EDIT - yes he has a job. I take him to work everyday and pick him up at the end of his shift. He has a good job but saving money. Most of you have said that he doesn't respect me and
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 25
    yes I do see that and have for a while. I know that I'm just letting him walk all over me and that's why I talked to him last month about it and told him I needed him to figure it out.
    via TheMostlyBusyBee
  • 26
    Ironyismylife28 Let him know that this is the last month you will be paying for storage, then go in and let the storage place know that you are ending the contract at the end of the month. Make sure he knows that, and let him figure it out.
    via Ironyismylife28
  • 27
    Then, don't resign your lease, move out, and leave this loser behind. He doesn't want a partner he wants a mommy. Let him figure out how to be a grown-up. You don't need to
    via Ironyismylife28
  • 28
    waste your time and money on this man NTA... but you will be if you continue to let him use you
    via Ironyismylife28
  • 29
    Far-Season-695 NTA but you have bigger problems than the car. You're dating an entitled man child. Probs time to cut him loose
    via Far-Season-695
  • 30
    OddShelter5543 Nta. He could have taken it to the scrap yard by now and saved $1600. Man needs to step up and lead.
    via OddShelter5543
  • 31
    Odd-End-1405 ΝΤΑ Does he bring ANYTHING to the table? Sounds like an entitled, lazy, mooch who expects you to mommy him for life. Why are you with him?
    via Odd-End-1405

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boyfriend family drama aita kids car reddit story relationships parenting girlfriend dad entitled family Reddit women parents children entitled people
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